Suzi Goes To Skull Island

This steaming great hunk of jungle perversion was suggested by Cyril Boskins from Tamworth which coincidentally is where I was born. I only hung around a couple of weeks though; once my tightarse parents had sufficiently exploited Britain’s free national health service I was whisked back to the States.
It’s always bugged me that my mum picked somewhere with a soppy name like Tamworth to pop me out. Growing up in Montana with pals who were born in cool sounding places like Big Sandy, Whitefish and Anaconda was a real pain. My best friend, Billy Korst, was known as Bear Creek Billy. Me? I was just that Tosser From Tamworth.
As I got older I’d lie to chicks, telling them that I came from some real macho sounding town but the truth always came out, probably because there’s no such place as Huge Knob, Virginia. Mind you, I’m often referred to as a ‘huge knob’ so maybe there is!