“All exploitive art should look like it’s been knocked up at 5am by some wasted bum who once had talent but is now seriously on the slide.”

Suzi Does The Killer Mermaids

£30.00

Here’s another one for Suzi’s next book, Suzi Screams Again! This time the suggested monsters come from the dire 2014 horror movie Killer Mermaids. Understandably,  Barry Burns from Colchester wishes to remain anonymous and doesn’t want to be credited on the ACKNOWLEDGEMENT PAGES. Well Barry, everyone who was credited in Suzi’s last book wants to remain anonymous but unfortunately folks who suggest garbage like Killer Mermaids deserve everything they get.

So, while Barry slinks off and inflates a shoulder to cry on, we’ll get busy and discuss today’s scintillating listing! This beauty was created over three hot steamy days here in sunny England. Initially Suzi was set to pose with Rawhead Rex for her Dark Side column but when her chums Wang and Sum Ho popped round for a frolick in my pool the opportunity to do Barry’s suggestion was to good to resist.

All in all, not too bad an effort methinks, especially considering that my pool is about the size of a bird bath and can be inflated to full size even faster than Barry’s wife!