“All exploitive art should look like it’s been knocked up at 5am by some wasted bum who once had talent but is now seriously on the slide.”

Sharknado

£30.00

Sharknado is beyond bad and it’s hard to single out one bit that’s any worse than the others but one scene that does stand out is when Nova Clarke (Cassie) falls into the shark’s maw and her boyfriend pipes up with “Nova, no!”, sounding for all the world like a man who’s just spotted his dog pooping on the patio!