“All exploitive art should look like it’s been knocked up at 5am by some wasted bum who once had talent but is now seriously on the slide.”

Seven

£30.00

This oil painting has been done in a brutal and aggressive style because let’s face it, films don’t come much more brutal and aggressive than Seven! Nowadays art directors tend to go for super slick, photo realistic illustrations but fortunately this for The Dark Side magazine and they trust that I’ll always come up with a winning cover; the blind fools!

Of course, The Dark Side is owned by the biggest tightarse in history (Allan Bryce) and as he goes into anaphylactic shock every time he has to buy a round of drinks he’s hardly likely to pay for changes. Come to think of it, I’m lucky if I get paid at all so ignore the fact that you’re all flat broke after Xmas and buy a print!