“All exploitive art should look like it’s been knocked up at 5am by some wasted bum who once had talent but is now seriously on the slide.”

Mark Of The Vampire

£30.00

Normally I’ll paint a Dark Side cover and then 3 weeks later I’ll get contacted to do the next one. For some reason though, I’ve been asked to crank out four (Lust For A Vampire, Jack The Ripper, Kolchak and Mark Of The Vampire) in as many weeks. Is there something Sally (my wife) and Brycie (world’s biggest tightarse and editor) aren’t telling me? Should I be checking for blood in my stool? Am I going to last long enough to see my book come out? Oh well, at least my last painting wasn’t just another pair of huge tits. It will be though, if I can squeak through another three days!