“All exploitive art should look like it’s been knocked up at 5am by some wasted bum who once had talent but is now seriously on the slide.”

Ghost Of Frankenstein


Some joker mentioned on a forum the other day that because I work quite fast all my oil paintings must be Photoshop fakes which are manipulated to look like original oils. If so, then all those customers who complained that their paintings weren’t quite dry when they opened them were obviously talking out of their bottoms!
Of course, even if I had Photoshop I’d still be too stupid to know how to use it. I haven’t figured out how to use my phone yet!